Is it my turn yet?

I sent a very dramatic voice note on WhatsApp to a friend today. And I only realised how dramatic it was, once I listened to it on playback.

Long story short, I was basically in tears as our smallest of the triplets is sick. Again.

Seems like they have just been sick CONSTANTLY since they started half-day daycare 3 weeks ago.

Daddy has a fishing trip next weekend with his friends & colleagues starting next Thursday to Sunday. He gets 3 nights away from home without any responsibility! Am I wrong to be jealous??

The deal was, that I also get a wee bit of “me time” in exchange for the 3 days of freedom that Daddy gets on this fishing trip.

So, Daddy was going to take the triplets to go visit granny & grandpa, for one night, so I could get a minute to breathe.

(Three 2yr olds are hard work yo).

I even arranged for awesome teenager to sleep over at a friends house for the night.

Now normally, when I have “me time” (which has happened 3 times in the past 27 months), I just stay at home, catch up on some series that I recorded, have copious amounts of red wine and sleep in.

This time, I actually planned a night out with one of my besties, attending the friggen Octoberfest! So if you don’t know… Octoberfest is a BIG damn deal in 061!

Well… since Murphy occupies a room in our rather crowded house, it was rather obvious that something or someone would stick a hypothetical spanner in the works.

Turns out our smallest “I prayed for your survival”-boy, is sick.

And NOTHING in this world matters more to me than our kids’ health.

So… I will be putting the outfit (false eyelashes.. it’s all I could find that fit) that I had planned for the night,  away… and spend Friday night with precious little sick boy, whilst daddy takes the 2 healthier ones away.

I must admit… I’m rather excited, as our once “I just need you Mommy” boy has become so damn independent, that I just pray for some quality cuddle time with him.

When he is sick, he just wants me. (The thought of this, is gratification at its best)

One day we will be rewarded for our sacrifices. But it’s just not today… and that’s ok.

#momlife #ireallyneedabreak #wedothisoutoflove #iregretnothing #iloveyoubabyboo

What the actual?

I’ve recently discovered that my fountain of youth is slowly running dry.  Not even joking.  And it’s like it happened overnight.  I know you are only as young as you feel, but this kite isn’t flying like it’s supposed to. One day I was still 18 till I died, the next I avoid getting out of my pyjamas on weekends full-stop.  And I avoid people too.  Crazy right? Social butterfly turned into a chubby little sloth.

First it was just one thing, but now I need 2 hands to count the things that I’ve started to notice about getting older.

1. Not a morning person

I used to be a ray of sunshine in the mornings. Since I can remember.  Like so much it resulted in Hubs asking me to tone ALL of it down, at least till he was properly awake every morning.  I now closely resemble the Grinch who stole mornings.  Nobody breathes till I’ve had my coffee. Or else.

2. Facial Hair

Random, fine little blonde hairs popping up on random places on my face.  Where the hell did it come from and why is it here?  Don’t test me Susan, I have wax and hair removal cream and I’m not afraid to use it.  I now permanently roll with a titanium tweezer in my handbag.  Ain’t nobody got time for an unwanted facial hair.

3. Eyebrows

Where did they go? Man I loved them so much. I used to have lush eyebrows in my twenties, now in my late thirties, there’s barely anything to tint once a month.  Hello microblading and eyebrow pencils. Seems like the hair on my brows have now taken up a new residence on random places on my face.  No fair!

4. My love of wine

In my twenties I would never have thought that I’d be a wine guzzling Tricenarian.  Oooh I love it so much!  Maybe a little too much, but that’s a post for another day.  No judging Judy!

5. Snacking

I find myself constantly needing something (good) to chew on.  Cheese, chips, biltong etc.  Maybe it’s because grumpy bear is supposed to hibernate during winter and not have to deal with life.  And besides, snacks are life.  Feed me and I’m happy… Hubs knows this too.  Bless his heart.

6. Zero craps given (and yes, I wanted to use the other F word, but my mom reads my blogs)

As I’ve gotten older, I’ve realized that I am less and less bothered by what other people think of me and how I choose to live my life.  Ooh, and best part… I GET TO CHOOSE!  Isn’t that just the absolute best… You get to choose who & what you surround yourself with.  Don’t feel like seeing people, then just say no to invites…  no need to make up silly excuses.  No is an answer, full stop!

7. Family & close friends are life

I’ve never been a big-group-of-friends gal.  I’ve always just had a handful of friends who I love spending time with.  Same with family.  If I get to spend every weekend with my little tribe, I am dead happy.  Gone are the days when going out was everything.  I prefer staying home or having a chilled braai with fam or friends.

8. The Big Chill

Lawwwdyyyy, where have you been all my life!  The moment the triplets were out of the danger zone one year in, I’ve miraculously learned to be more patient and just CHILL.  Like…

Our house is a hot mess on a weekend…. Whatever!  At least we have a house.

I just stuck my finger in some Triplet poop…. Whatever! Could have been worse, they could have thrown up in my face.

There’s no milk for coffee…  Whatever!  I’ll just use some baby formula.

See where I’m going with this?

Other than the facial hair and minimal eyebrows, I’m kinda enjoying this phase of life.  Here’s to many more years of the Big Chill

Also….  It’s FriYAY!

Our Little Rockstar Sleepers

If you told me a year ago that I would resort to sleep training I would call you a liar to your face.  Then slap it too.  How dare you utter those words.  I don’t think so Susan! Not in this house.

I was the absolute LAST person who would even think of trying sleep training purely because my heart just can’t deal hearing my kids cry for me and I can’t pick them up.

When you reach a certain level of sleep deprivation, you become sort of desperate and you then start considering things that would normally go against your every belief.

Look, I’ve heard of many success stories, but many failures too.  Each person has their own 2 cents, methods, opinions etc.  So I chatted to many moms who have tried it, researched different methods to the ends of the earth and we finally settled on Gentle Sleep Training.  I for one would never try or recommend the Crying-It-Out method… it goes against all logical reasoning with regards to your baby’s emotional well-being! (In my opinion) 

We did not follow all the guidelines to the T, but we discussed and settled on our own version and I can proudly say that we succeeded.  From the day the Trips were born, we agreed on never rocking our babies to sleep.  Out of experience with my eldest, it’s a natural instinct to rock your baby.  Well meaning also.  But it can also be the straw that breaks the camels back.  Literally.

I remember rocking Teenager to sleep for at least an hour every night when she was a baby.  It became the norm as she couldn’t fall asleep on her own as she was now used to it.  She is almost 15 now and the irreversible damage I have done to my neck, shoulders & back has been immense.  I still suffer from random muscle spasms if I don’t regularly go for physio sessions.  You see, hindsight is a wonderful thing…  We teach our kids these bad habits then bitch & moan when we can’t get them out of it.  We are our own worst enemies. 

Getting back to trying gentle sleep training..

It literally took us 3 nights.  THREE.  And the Trips were into their new bedtime routine.  Crazy right?!  So, if you’d like to know what we did, here’s my step by step guide to our Gentle Sleep Training success.

Just for reference purposes, our previous normal bedtime routine entailed the following:

19:00 – Bathtime

19:40 – We (Hubs, Teenager & myself) would each take a Triplet, cuddle with them on the couch whilst giving them their bottle and they would fall asleep in our arms.  Once they were fully asleep (around 20 – 30 minutes later), we would put them in bed.

New routine:

19:00 – Bathtime

19:40 – I say “It’s bedtime” and they follow me to their bedroom, we put them in their Sleep Sense sleeping bags, into bed with their blankies & bottle, and I sit on the floor in the middle of their room reading a bedtime story, say a prayer, say goodnight to each baby and turn the lights out.

Night 1 (Monday.  Sidenote:  Why is it that we feel so brave on Mondays to start new things… diets, new habits etc)

Followed new bedtime routine, left nightlight on dim, said goodnight and walked out of the room and sat in the lounge (This was my biggest mistake)

These poor babies balled their eyes out.  15 Minutes in and I caved when I saw my littlest Triplet sitting in the corner of his cot sobbing his little heart out.  So we each picked up a baby and went back to the old bedtime routine for the night.  My heart just couldn’t deal.

Night 1 (again, as the first night 1 was a failure)

Followed the new bedtime routine, but sat on a chair in the middle of the room after I turned the light off.  Whenever the crying got a bit much, I would sing a lullabye (maybe that’s why they were crying… for me to stop). In between that I would softly & gently reassure them that I was there and that it was sleepy time.  Only 55 minutes of intermittent crying and they were fast asleep.

Night 2

Followed the new bedtime routine, still seated on chair against their cupboards, turned the light off. Sang another lullabye or 2, still gently reassured, but not as much as the previous night. Only 15 minutes of intermittent crying and they were fast asleep.

Night 3

Followed the new bedtime routine, but this time, I sat on a pillow on the floor against their cupboard, no singing or reassuring, just silent.  Only one of our Triplets whined around 3 times and within 10-15 minutes, they were fast asleep.

Night 4 – 5

Followed the new bedtime routine, still seated on a pillow on the floor against their cupboard, silent.  Fast asleep within 10 minutes

Night 6

Followed the new bedtime routine, only this time I told them that I was going to sit in the lounge with daddy and I walked out of the room after saying good night.  10 minutes, fast asleep.

And since then it has been a breeze putting our little angels to bed every night.  Is it for everybody? Probably not.  Will it be as easy as I make it out to be?  Might not.  But it sure has made a huge difference in our lives in such a short time!

The only advice I can give is to make sure that everyone in your team is ready to make the change.  Never forget, they are still your little babies, so be gentle Mama. On yourself and on them.  If it doesn’t work the first time round, wait a couple of weeks and try again.

Next challenge:  Getting the Trips to sleep through the night. 

I’m still a bit emotionally scarred following the first 2 nights of sleep training, think this one can wait for summer.

Challenge accepted (but postponed).

In the the words of Christina Perri – “I’m only human”

Peace out Mamas

 

 

 

I can’t make this Ish up

Frustrating morning. Had some trouble getting onto our blog. One would think I would have recovered full brain function by now from full-blown pregnancy brain… but nope. Even though it’s been 2 years.  I promise myself every time that I would get a little black book to write down all my passwords. Or better yet, an app on my phone. Odds are that I’ll probably forget that password too so it’s safe to say an actual little black book would be the best option.

Moving on.

We’ve gone into bit of a crisis mode the last week or so. BOTH of our nannies are pregnant. BOTH. We’ve known for quite some time now that Nanny 2 is around 4 months pregnant. Nanny 1 only notified me last Saturday via SMS (not even joking) that she is already 6 months pregnant! And that she’s known for 4 months. What the actual!?

So this means, that Nanny 1 will go on maternity leave from 1 Sept and will return to work on 1 Dec and Nanny 2 will go on maternity leave from 1 Dec to end Feb 2019. In the meantime we’ve had to make alternate arrangements with regards to childcare, finances etc.
Here’s the problem though, or at least one of them: Nanny 2 will basically be taking care of the very busy Trips for 3 months by herself whilst also being pregnant herself. Look, I know that most women carry pregnancy like rock stars, there are however some women who basically look and act like they’re actually dying and not just pregnant. Nanny 2 is the latter. It’s not fair of us to expect her to literally carry the full weight of her pregnancy and the responsibility of caring for the Trips who are now VERY busy.

Problem 2 is that Nanny 1 will return from maternity leave on 1 Dec, most probably exhausted as most new moms are. She will also have to find alternative childcare for her baby as she cannot possibly take care of the once again VERY busy Triplets and a newborn baby. And frankly, I won’t allow it. She will only be back at work for a week or so, then she’s off on annual leave any way.

As you can imagine, this puts us in a VERY difficult situation with regards to childcare. Not just childcare, but our finances too. We’re already cutting it very close budget wise with me not having an income at the moment.
Hubs and I have discussed putting the Trips into a daycare full time from January 2019 for quite some time now (before we knew about the pregnancies). We also feel that the Trips are just not getting enough stimulation/education at home from our Nannies. This meant that we would have to retrench the nannies at the end of December 2018. These back to back pregnancies have thrown a hypothetical spanner into the works as we are not allowed (by law) to start the retrenchment period whilst they are still pregnant as it would be grounds for unfair dismissal/retrenchment. Also, we want to do what is right by them as well.

We’ve now resulted in having to enroll the trips into full daycare from 01 November already, whilst reducing Nanny 2’s working hours & salary for Nov as she will then be 8,5 months pregnant. The Trips will be at the daycare anyway and she will assist our domestic in light cleaning and ironing only. This still means that we have to pay her salary plus over N$8000 in daycare fees. According to law, we may only retrench the nannies once their maternity leave is over and they have been given at least 4 weeks’ notice plus a decent severance package.

While we adore our nannies and we’re so happy for them with regards to their pregnancies, it has made our lives a little bit harder for the next couple of months.

Rant over.

Just as with everything in life, this too shall pass. Chop-chop

 

Dear Grace

Dear Grace

When I left work today, I didn’t expect for one second to see you kneeling on a pavement, with your head lying on the ground. My window was open and I could hear you cry. I could not just drive by.

I pulled my car onto the curb & jumped out, only to see your mother (or whoever she is) sitting further down the stairs, shouting profanities at you. Was that why you were crying Grace? Or the fact that she left you, a tiny baby, on a sidewalk, next to a very busy road. Scared, probably hungry, alone & unloved? Was she using you for “bait” so an unsuspecting passerby (like me) would stop, feel sorry for you and give her money to care for you (but in reality fuel her next fix?)

Grace, I’m so sorry that this is the hand you have been dealt with. I’m so sorry for shouting at your mom for mistreating you. I’m so sorry that you are hungry, cold, scared and probably not loved.

When I left in a hurry and returned with necessities for you, I knelt down to talk to your mom and you crawled to me and stood up to touch me. Or maybe you just wanted to feel loved. I hope for a few seconds you did as I held your hand tightly and brushed your beautiful cheeks lightly.

I will never forget your big, beautiful brown eyes Grace. I will never forget the way you looked into my soul.

I will pray for you every day Grace.

I will go look for you tomorrow and every day thereafter to make sure you’re ok.

I hope your “mother” wraps you snuggly in your new blanket tonight, that your tummy is full and that you feel safe & loved before you drift off to sleep.

God loves you Grace.

Me too.

 

 

A moment of temporary insanity

On days like today, I wish I had a Go-Pro strapped to my forehead to record the absolute madness that went down in the Mall this afternoon. That way I would have proof that it actually happened otherwise NO ONE would believe this ish.

Occasionally, if and when Hubs and I both happen to get off work early on a Friday, we like to pop into a pub/restaurant close to our home to have a hour of alone time, order some take aways for the evening, have a drink and just enjoy each other’s company… You know, like normal adults before we arrive home at 5pm to let our nannies leave.

I left work this afternoon and quickly had to rush to Maerua Mall to buy some groceries, after which I would join Hubs for a drink. I rushed through the shop and ended up with a trolley full of groceries (as us women do when we go grocery shopping without a list), paid and rushed out the shop again.

I get to the elevator, wait for the doors to open, push my full trolley all the way into the elevator only to realise that I haven’t paid for my parking yet. So I… wait for it… leave the damn trolley in the elevator and walk out to the parking meter to pay for my parking. As I popped my parking ticket into the slot, I turn cold as I hear the elevator doors close behind me, only to turn around and watch my trolley full of groceries go up, up & away. What in the actual fudge was I thinking?! That my trolley would just magically follow me out of the elevator like an obedient dog?

And so the chaos began… I immediately freaked out, rushed towards the stairs opposite the elevators and ran like I was a fat kid chasing the ice cream truck. Now if you know me, you’ll know these 2 things about me:

1. I HATE stairs
2. I don’t run. Like ever.

Anyway, so I run up to the first floor only to see nothing. I run up another floor only to get to an elevator whose doors closed on me again. I run down to the first floor again only to see my precious trolley full of fine goods in an elevator full of strangers, going down again. I run down another floor and to my delight, a good samaritan who witnessed the whole thing, (and who probably thinks I am bat-shit crazy by now) removed my trolley from the lift and was standing proudly next to it like he just saved a kitten that was stuck in a tree.

You sir… you deserve a Bells.

To top it all off, I left my parking ticket in the meter and some genius chucked it away so I had to pay N$50 for a new one so I could just get the hell outta there.

What I learnt today:

1. Never go shopping when thirsty for an adult beverage… it will make you do crazy things.
2. Maybe tying my trolley to my wrist with a safety harnass is not such a bad idea.
3. Strappy Sandals are not the best running shoes.

That is all

#insaneinthemembrane #enoughalready #stop&stare

It’s a Mom thing

We all have a mutual understanding between us.  Us Moms.  “Me time” is like the forbidden word that may not be uttered.  We dare not say it out loud.  Ever.  Just in case someone else feels like we don’t deserve it.  Or that we don’t Mom hard enough to be entitled to time for ourselves.  Or maybe it’s because we feel guilty wanting time for ourselves.  Or that we’re such control freaks that we won’t allow anyone else to take the hypothetical wheel and take charge, “cause no one knows my baby like I do”.

On Wednesday (out of the blue), Hubs offered to take the kids to go visit their grandparents for the weekend. (Side Note:  Hubs has an annual fishing guy trip coming up in August, so he’s collecting brownie points… just saying) Even though we had plans on Saturday to take the Trips to go see Lollos live at the Rock ‘n Run event… I jumped at the chance.  (Screw Lollos, we’ll just buy them another DVD)

It’s been a rough couple of weeks.  With a bout of Mom Flu (It’s like Man Flu, except no one gives a damn) and a hectic work schedule, I really needed a break.  As much as I tried to contain my excitement on Wednesday evening when Hubs offered, my face literally lit up and I know that he noticed it. Bless his heart.

So, excitement in tow, I chatted to a few other moms at work during the course of the day today and blurted out my plans for the weekend… which was absolutely nothing.

I have & made no plans.

I chatted about how I just wanted to take a long bath for at least an hour, shave for the first time since December holidays, SLEEEEEEEP, eat junk, no routine, watch my recorded shows on TV really loud (not as loud as our obnoxious neighbour watches TV though).

Just. Be.

The best part about sharing my nothing plans with said moms was that They Got It.  They legitimately got the nothing part.  They got the lying in the bath for an hour part.  They got the sleeeeep part. They got the junk eating part.  They were just as excited as I was.  Because they get it. Me time is like a rare commodity when you’re a parent.  So moms get it.  It’s a mom thing.  It’s what connects us. Spiritually & emotionally.

So for the next 48 hours I’m rebelling against routine. Against toddler-proofing. Against blinds that are always only halfway drawn because The Trips keep fudging them up. I’ll go to bed late.  I’ll sleep in tomorrow morning.  I’ll eat a whole bowl of Nik Naks by myself without sharing AND I will lick my fingers afterwards.

Also, I’m leaving my empty wine glass on the coffee table.

My big.. BIG news

I don’t even want to say it out loud… but my BIG news is that starting tomorrow afternoon, I (along with Teenager) will have 48 hours to ourselves. For the first time since I’ve been pregnant with the Trips.

To.do.whatever.we.want.

No triplets, no daddy, no routine, no madness. But also, no cuddles with my smoochies 😦

Now don’t get me wrong… I adore our sometimes crazy life, but Mommy needs a break y’all!

Stay tuned for all things wine, yoga pants, binge watching series, Xmas decor & gift wrapping and quality me-time tales!

Don’t be jelly Linda!

 

 

Presently

Yes… I know it’s been a while.

Yes, I also know in order for any lifestyle blog to be successful, one needs to post quite regularly. Like every day. But life happens. It happens so quickly that I am so scared I miss it. Our kids are growing up so rapidly that I am just trying to take everything in, before it’s over.

So, this post is aimed at our life right now. Nothing major happening, yet so many fabulous things, so I’ll provide an update for each family member.

Teenager Girl Child

She started exams last week. Like Grade 8 exams. This means when she’s finished with exams in 2 weeks, she’ll just have 4 years left of high school.

I am just not ready to deal!

She has so much ambition. So many dreams for her future. Her goal for this year was/is to achieve a grade average of 80% for the year. No rewards, no special treatment.. that is what she wants for herself.

I mean… wow.

She has butterflied into an extraordinary young lady who knows EXACTLY what she wants for herself. She is incredibly goal driven, incredibly intelligent and incredibly beautiful… to the point that I die a little on the inside when I have to let her out of our house. Be it for school, a date (with an incredible young gentleman whom I’ve grown to adore, but am not allowed to mention or show it), or for sunday school. She amazes me.

Triplets – First Born, our little champ Christian

Two days ago, this little guy decided that he ain’t leopard crawling no more and has just been crawling EVERYWHERE. Before that it was a bit of crawling and leopard crawling for the most part. Two days ago he also decided that he would finally stand up against things/furniture all by himself. We’ve been taking him to weekly physio sessions for the last 2 months as it was almost like his feet/ankle muscles have grown stiff in a horizontal position due to always being on his tummy/leopard crawling. He has 6 teeth, eats everything and is also starting to sleep so much better! (Yay!) He’s developed a bit of a temper, or should I rather say.. irritability with his sister 😜

Triplets – Second Born, our CareBear MJ

Our little snuggle bunny MJ is standing and dancing like it’s nobody’s business. He is so enthusiastic about every little thing, especially pasta, a sip of daddy’s beer, bubbles and plastic bowls and wooden spoons. He has 8 teeth, also eats everything (and so neatly might I add) and sleeps right through the night on most nights, with the exception of a few 3am “night calls” to come sleep between mommy & daddy. He adores cuddles, viennas and sticking his finger in belly buttons then laughing like he just discovered treasure. Our little snuggle bunny.

Triplets – Last Born, our little “Oorlogskippie”

I probably don’t have enough time or space to elaborate on this little firecracker. She is so much of me that it scares me. EXTRA ALL.THE.TIME, happy, passionate, loud and so busy that she exhausts all of us! She has 4 teeth, is almost walking, is so petite still and tends to end up as the dirtiest of all 3 at the end of the day, every day. She hates dresses; frilly, girly outfits; hates having her face cleaned or hair washed (yet loves a very long bath) and hates not getting ALL of the attention. She also eats everything, only to spit it out in her hand when it’s too chunky for her liking & then “painting” her feet with it under her feeding chair table where she thinks “I won’t notice”. She went from being our good sleeper to waking up a minimum of 3 times per night. I adore this little ray of sunshine to the ends of the earth.

The Hubs – Our Rock

While I tend to keep him out of my posts as he hates social media, I will give an update about him too.

Not sure if everyone knows, but we work for the same company. He recently ventured out on his own as an adviser after working with his dad for a couple of years.

I am so incredibly proud of him. He has been working so hard and as a bonus, he loves what he does for a living! (That makes me incredibly happy!)

I honestly don’t know if a better, more loving, more involved, more supportive dad & husband exists in this world. Yes, I understand that your husband is great too, but mine takes the cake 🤗

It’s his birthday on Wednesday and I simply can’t wait. Coz let’s face it, I’m totes cray-cray for making my people feel special on their birthdays.

As for me… I am healthy, I am blessed and I am so damn content. Also… 37 sleeps till our family vacation at the coast!!